User Post: 8 tips for liking someone better (or disliking that person less)

User Post: 8 tips for liking someone better (or disliking that person less)

Eight tips for liking someone better (or disliking that person less).
Some people are part of your life, whether you want them there or not. What if you don’t have the warmest of feelings for your boss? your mother-in-law? your next-door neighbor?
It’s easy to come up with a mental catalog of all the ways in which that person could change to be less annoying, domineering, passive-aggressive, arrogant, etc.—but fact is, you can’t change anyone but yourself.
Here are some tips about how to help yourself cultivate more friendly feelings. It’s quite a strain to hide feelings of dislike; if you can manage to change your feelings, you’ll be much happier. It’s hard, but not impossible.

1. Seek contact. This is a bit counter-intuitive. If you don't like someone, you probably feel like avoiding that person, but because of the psychological phenomenon known as the mere exposure effect, we tend to like people better the more we see them.

2. Do nice things for that person. “We prefer to see those to whom we do good than those who do good to us,” as La Rochefoucauld observed.

3. Give that person a brief touch. Subliminal touching, i.e., touching a person so unobtrusively that it’s not noticed, increases people’s sense of well-being and positive feelings.

4. Lighten up. Joke about whatever annoys you, and if you can manage it, laugh about it with that person, or poke fun at your own reaction. Nothing neutralizes bad feelings like a good laugh.

This can be tough, however.

Read more of this article by Gretchen Rubin

And Still I Rise by Maya Angelou

Check out this You tube video of Maya Angelou (And Still I Rise)

Like many of her poems this very inspirational, here are the words:

You may write me down in history

With your bitter, twisted lies,

You may trod me in the very dirt

But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?

Why are you beset with gloom?

'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells

Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,

With the certainty of tides,

Just like hopes springing high,

Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?

Bowed head and lowered eyes?

Shoulders falling down like teardrops.

Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?

Don't you take it awful hard

'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines

Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,

You may cut me with your eyes,

You may kill me with your hatefulness,

But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?

Does it come as a surprise

That I dance like I've got diamonds

At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame

I rise

Up from a past that's rooted in pain

I rise

I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,

Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear

I rise

Into a daybreak that's wondrously clearI rise

Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,

I am the dream and the hope of the slave.

I rise

I rise

I rise.

Maya Angelou And Still I Rise

Shortcuts for Everyday Tasks

Shortcuts for Everyday Tasks
By Amanda Hinnant

Keep a Journal
If the last entry in your diary is a cryptic scribble from 2003, stop writing and start printing―e-mails, that is. Since you’re probably already summarizing your life in e-mails to your friends and family, print them out and paste them on the pages of a blank notebook, suggests Oriah Mountain Dreamer, author of What We Ache For: Creativity and the Unfolding of Your Soul (HarperOne, $22, amazon.com). “It’s like my yoga teacher once said about working out: ‘All you need to do is stretch for five minutes a day,’” Mountain Dreamer says. “Of course, once you get going, it feels so good, you’ll wind up doing more.”

Run Errands
“Plan the order of your stops in a clockwise direction,” advises Susan Hamersky, owner of the Los Angeles–based errand company California Concierge. “That way, you avoid all the time-consuming left turns.” Also, schedule your errands so you can drop things off on your way out and pick them up on your way home, says Dan McMackin, a spokesman for UPS and a former driver. Keep a cooler in your car for perishables, too. Then a stop at the market doesn’t have to be immediately followed by a run home to the refrigerator, says Julie Hagenmaier, founder and CEO of My Girl Friday, an errand company in Cincinnati.

Get Your Daily Vitamins
Try a bowl of Total, says David Grotto, a registered dietitian in Evanston, Illinois, and a spokesman for the American Dietetic Association. The cereal is fortified with 100 percent of the daily value of 12 vitamins and minerals. Drink the milk, too―it will add even more vitamins, including those it washes off the cereal, Grotto says.

Turn Day Wear Into Evening Wear
Work is over, and you're ready for cocktails. Transform your office self for a night out with these tools.

• An extra pair of earrings. Always have two pairs―one small and one dangly. You can also attach clip-on earrings to your pumps.
• A lightweight shawl. "It's an easy new focal point for your outfit," says fashion consultant Leah Feldon, author of Does This Make Me Look Fat?: The Definitive Rules for Dressing Thin for Every Height, Size, and Shape (Villard, $15, amazon.com).
• A fancy pair of pumps. Or a pair of strappy sandals.
  Black eyeliner. For a smoky look, line your outer rims close to the lash lines, then smudge with a cotton swab, says New York City makeup artist Mally Roncal.
• A peachy cream blush. "The color will uplift your cheeks and eyelids," says New York City makeup artist Lea Siegel.

Get Cut Flowers to Bloom
First try cutting the stems at an angle, then placing the bouquet in warm water. If that doesn’t work, use a blow-dryer with a diffuser to simulate the sunshine’s warmth, says Denis Chandler, the owner of Bloomsberry Flowers, in Wilmington, Delaware.


Buy Clothes Without Trying Them On
You have good reasons to avoid the dressing room―long lines and fluorescent lighting among them―so skip it altogether by sizing yourself up first at home, says designer Cynthia Rowley. Note how your favorite clothes look when you hold them to your body, and recall that when you're shopping. If the fabric of a pair of jeans or a skirt doesn't exactly meet the edge of your waistline when you hold it up, it won't fit correctly, Feldon says. And the next time you're in a hurry at the department store, remember this measurement trick from Rowley: The distance from the side of your neck to the tip of your fingers (on an outstretched arm) is about the same length as your inseam.

Catch Up on Current Events
Nobody likes being out of the loop. Here's how the people who bring you the news get up to speed.

• I do a quick scan of CNN.com and AssignmentEditor.com, which allows you to access any newspaper in the country, and I read the Wall Street Journal's "What's News" section, says CNN's Paula Zahn.
• I put C-Span on in the background while I put away dishes or pay bills, says Mark Halperin, the political director of ABC News and the editor of The Note, on the network's website.
• On the Internet, scan the New York Times and the New York Post, says Post editor Isaac Guzman. Then watch a 30-minute roundup on CNN, Fox News, and MSNBC.

Speak a Foreign Language
¿No habla español? No problem. You don't need to complete a six-month course of elementary Spanish to make your way in Madrid. “Get a little pocket language book, and instead of attempting to learn the language, learn a few key phrases,” says Harold Jenkins, a Chicago-based travel agent and a frequent traveler. Elizabeth Lunney, cofounder of New York City's ABC Language Exchange, recommends Berlitz Phrasebooks because they’re “easy to navigate, come in many languages, and help with pronunciation.” Don George, global-travel editor for Lonely Planet, says the following words and phrases are the most useful:
Hello
Good-bye
Yes
No
Please
Thank you
Excuse me
Sorry
Do you speak English?
I don’t understand.
How much?
I would like…
Where is…?
Train station
Bathroom

Read more of this Article By Amanda Hinnant

Share our Strength's Taste the Nation

FORT LAUDERDALE - Thursday, June 25, 2009
www.strengthsouthflorida.org
Broward County Convention Center
1950 Eisenhower Blvd.
Fort Lauderdale, FL 33316

6:00 - 7:00 VIP Reception
7:00 - 10:00 Tasting & Auction

Share Our Strength’s Taste of the Nation Greater Fort Lauderdale/ South Palm Beach in June and Taste of the Nation Miami in July. Savor the finest dishes and drinks prepared by the area’s hottest chefs and mixologists, enjoy the best wines and bid in exciting live and silent auctions, all to catch the more than 350, 000 children at risk of hunger in our community and ensure they have nutritious foods where they live, learn and play! One hundred percent of ticket sales help ensure no kid in South Florida grows up hungry.

What's Great about a Recession? Deals, Deals, and more Deals

What's Great about a Recession? Deals, Deals, and more Deals
Often times, it is difficult to realize the positive opportunities in challenging times. Not everyone can agree that we are currently in a recession, but everyone can agree that there are several deals and discounts offered all around us. I am here to minimize your findings to just visiting one place for saving money in these trying times.
Traveling?
Carnival Cruise Lines offers deals for as low as $479 for seven nights from Miami to the western Caribbean.Expedia.com is giving away last-minute packages from New York to Las Vegas and a two night stay at the opulent MGM Grand Hotel and Casino for $312.Book a fare on www.Southwest.com where prices start as low as $49 for a one-way ticket with 14-day advance booking.

Homes
The decline in home values has reached $3.3 trillion and the average sales cycle is nine months, says Michelle Collins, senior vice president and director of mortgage lending for Shore Bank in Chicago. To get the best deal, she advises not to be afraid of rehabs. Many banks have construction loans that allow consumers to receive money to fix up a home.
Renters can now get more bedrooms for their buck, thanks to a nationwide decline in occupancy rates. Go to www.realestateabc.com for details.Real estate owned properties are properties that go back to the bank after a failed foreclosure auction. Try www.mortgagenewsdaily.com for listings near you.FHA loans (fha.com) along with a down payment assistance program and the $8,000 tax credit for 2009 is an incredible deal for home buying.

Cars
Need a new set of wheels?Start bargaining at $1500 to $2,000 off the sticker price. Ask for incentives, such as employee pricing (normally a 7 percent discount), inquire about demos. Go to Autofinancing101.org for the best finance rates.
Ford is offering 2.9% financing for 60 months and up to $4,000 cash back on many 2009 models.Kia motors is giving away much as $5,000 cash back on some 2008 models hence - great time to buy.Ford offers payments of up to $700 for 12 months if you’re laid off. Return to Hyundai if you lose your income and can’t resume payments after three months. *Information and prices are subject to change.

Fashion
Retailers are rolling out the red carpet to frugal fashionistas and moms getting a jump on back-to-school bargains.
Check out www.Secondcitystyle.com and Fashion Guru (thefashionguru.wordpress.com) for jewelry, totes, shoes and even spa treatments at incredible discounts.
Subscribe to www.DailyCandy.com for sample sites in major cities, or sign up for Gilt Groupe (www.gilt.com/essencemagazine.com) for steals of up to 70% percent off.